A quick trip around the internet shows that scores of corporations are being targeted by activists on the left and on the right. Some lucky companies, like Amazon, Netflix, Starbucks and Ben & Jerry’s have angered both lefties and righties and are dealing with dueling boycotts.
“Chappaquiddick” is about an entitled, philandering U.S. Senator from a powerful family who let a girl drown in his car - he waited more than 10 hours to report that he’d driven off a bridge with a 28-year-old female passenger - while he tried to figure out how to save his sorry political ass.
And the censors are worried about smoking?
Local visionaries are at it again: Trying to concoct a new moniker for the region after making a balls of it several decades ago with “Hampton Roads.”
They never learn.
I dreaded everything about this forbidding city school. Like all new kids, I especially fretted about lunch. Where would I sit? Who would I talk to? I felt sick thinking about it.
One salesman ordered us to wait while he ran back to a desk from which he produced a discount coupon. In a whisper he pretended he wasn’t supposed to offer an additional mark down on top of their “rock-bottom” Fourth of July sales prices, but he liked us.
I didn’t like him.
Pit bulls are banned in many cities and counties.They’re also banned in military housing.
Shoot, if the Marines are afraid of pit bulls, we all should be.
Yes, I’m aware I’m unemployed. Leave me alone. New shoes make me feel better about myself.
My heart would race every time my supermarket had one of those buy-two-get-three-free offers on cases of Diet Coke. I loved looking at all those silver boxes piled in my kitchen, knowing I wouldn’t run out of those beloved cans. For a couple of weeks anyway.
But if we’re honest, most of us will admit we don’t like people as much as we pretend we do. There is a glorious sense of relief that comes with no longer being forced to interact daily with the office idiot.
Especially if the office idiot is your boss.
I recently asked my daughter if she’d seen the Facebook ads that pop up constantly in my feed. The ones for a magical gloss that erases lip lines and gives women plump, juicy kissers.
She said no.
If your kid is considering a career in journalism you need to talk them out of it. Unless there's a trust fund, that is.
Perhaps you heard. Environmentalists want us to switch from toilet paper to swatches of fabric. Just like they used in the 18th century! This is progress, environmentalist-style.
You want to prevent this from happening again, United? Here's a thought: Don't cram pets into airless overhead bins to suffocate.
There. Problem solved.
People who don’t like to drive will never understand that delicious feeling of slipping behind the wheel of a peppy car that begs you to step on the accelerator and ignore the speedometer. A car that hugs the corners and purrs when you hit 80.
Truth is, part of the fun of filling out brackets - for the chronically law-abiding - is knowing that it’s a little bit illegal.
Kids like me - short and skinny - were always picked last for any team. When we whined about it, our parents were unsympathetic, saying something like, “You’re a shrimp. Deal with it.”
Is there anything more annoying than people who don’t know the difference between “less” and “fewer”? No, there isn’t. Glad we agree on this.
Look, I get it. With all the worry about skin cancer, no parent tries for a deep toddler tan.
Shoot, might as well sell the kids cigarettes.
Knock a year off a kid's age at a movie theater, and you've taught your child that dishonesty is excusable if it saves you a few bucks.
