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Michael Bloomberg: The Oligarch's Bad Night

I feel a little sorry for Bernie. Liz, too. Joe and Mayor Pete. Oh, and Amy. Almost forgot about her. 

These candidates are not among the top 1,000 people many of us would like to see in the White House, but give them credit. They’ve worked hard trying to earn the Democratic presidential nomination.

All politicians are egotistical and live for the adulation of crowds. Still, non-stop campaigning, fundraising, smiling, handshaking, speechifying and baby canoodling in the heat, rain, snow, when you have a headache or a cold, must be exhausting. A certain degree of respect is owed to anyone willing to put in that kind of work. Even if they’re only doing it because they’re hopeless narcissists. Or socialists. Or both.

The reward: One will win the nomination.

But this time, things aren’t going according to script. Michael Bloomberg parachuted into the process a year after it started. He hasn’t had to do the smelly stuff - begging for money - or the hard work of meeting regular people and smiling till his cheeks hurt.

Bloomberg is the closest thing we have in this country to an oligarch. With $60 billion, he literally has the loot to do anything he wants. He’s been spreading his dough around the country, bankrolling friendly politicians from coast to coast. Shoot, last year he bought himself a far-left General Assembly in Virginia by flooding candidates with his anti-gun PAC money.

Now he’s passing out cash to social media influencers to produce flattering memes and spending a bodacious amount of money - $338 million, they say - on his fledgling campaign.

But Wednesday night proved you can’t buy a good debate. Bloomberg looked weak and unprepared on stage.

“What a wonderful country we have,” Bloomberg said, delivering his lone memorable line of the night. “The best known socialist in the country happens to be a millionaire with three houses.”

Clearly, Bloomberg thinks he can purchase the Democratic nomination. And many mainstream Democrats see Mayor Stop-n-Frisk as their best hope to block Sanders.

The battle-hardened candidates on the Las Vegas stage last night made it clear that they don’t like each other and the one thing they all have in common is that they don’t like Bloomberg either. They don’t like his background or his shifting positions. Most of all, they loathe his billions.

The debate was pugnacious and downright hostile at times, filled with nasty asides and personal attacks.

Fun to watch.

Buttigieg and Klobuchar went after each other with catty, finger-wagging exchanges. They’re clearly vying for the same slice of voters. At the conclusion of the debate, the senator from Minnesota took a circuitous route off the stage to avoid shaking hands with the mayor from South Bend.

For his part, Biden prefaced every statement with “I’m the only person on this stage” and sounded like a sad man from a distant time as he repeatedly invoked the glory days of the Obama administration.

The former veep is irrelevant. No barbs were sent Biden’s way, a sign that his opponents have already written his political obituary.

Elizabeth Warren came out loaded for Bloomberg

”Democrats take a huge risk if we substitute one arrogant billionaire after another,” Warren quipped. “I'd like to talk about who we're running against: a billionaire who calls women fat broads and horse-faced lesbians, and, no, I'm not talking about Donald Trump. I'm talking about Mayor Bloomberg."

Ouch.

Problem is, Warren needs to erode Sanders’ support, not Bloomberg’s.

Sanders was Sanders. Red-faced, angry and proudly socialist. The audience loved him.

By contrast, the stiff and glum-looking Bloomberg wasn’t ready for prime time.

It’s going to take a lot of cash to erase the memory of this first debate.

And Bloomberg has it.